Falling
by bellesxfleurs08
Summary: After Meredith fails the intern test she decides to quit Seattle Grace. How will she deal with her life crumbling around her? How long will Derek keep breathing for her till he gives up? MerDer


This is my first attempt at Grey's Anatomy fanfiction. I've been watching Season 3 and it drives me crazy that Derek isn't there for her like he should be. I'm hoping to fix that. Enjoy 

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Meredith was numb. Her brain had shut down and she couldn't focus. She couldn't focus any longer on the deaths of her mother, her stepmother, or even herself. Couldn't focus on the complete destruction of the relationship that she had only just thought about forming with her long estranged father. She couldn't focus on the most important test of her entire career, and now her future was ruined. Meredith had killed her future just as she had killed Susan, her fake mommy whom she had grown to care a lot for in a short amount of time. She failed Susan, failed the test, she was an all around failure.

"Failure, failure," her mind taunted her as she aimlessly wandered the halls of the hospital. It didn't register with her that Cristina was following her, watching her but not sure what to do for her person. She didn't notice that she had walked right by Derek, that he had spoken to her, or that he was looking at her with that concerned face that he had seemingly perfected recently.

When her legs brought her to a waiting room and in front of a chair her body sat her down, and stayed there. Her fellow interns, who hadn't ruined their futures and would become residents unlike her, now kept their distance as they discussed what had happened. Eventually, they had to leave their post to continue on with their work, while Meredith started to think about what she was now going to do.

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Derek had just finished up with his patient and made his way into the scrub room. He had been worried about Meredith since their somewhat encounter in the hallway, and what George had said at the beginning of the surgery hadn't helped. "Dr. O'Malley, What is going on with Meredith that I don't know about? Was it going to the funeral, I knew that I should've gone with her."

He really hated being in this position. "The funeral? Uhm, Dr. Shepherd, Meredith didn't go to the funeral."

"What do you mean she didn't go?" Stunned didn't even begin to describe it.

"Her father showed up at the hospital this morning. Told her to her face that he didn't want her there at the funeral, that she killed Susan."

"Oh God. She didn't tell me. I didn't know. What about the test?"

"You should really talk to her about this."

"I tried. I asked her how it went, she just ignored me. She walked right by me and didn't say a word. Didn't even look at me. Cristina was following her, but she didn't tell me what happened."

"Meredith just completely blanked on the test, okay. She didn't answer a single question, she just sat there. Then when it was over she just got up and left. And now, now she's just sitting in the waiting room, not doing anything, she won't talk about it. But don't worry, I talked to the Chief, I'm pretty sure that he's going to give her another chance. Life has been pretty rough on her lately, you know? She'll pull through." George gave the older man a small smile and turned to go.

"Yeah," was the reply, but in his head all Derek could do is hope that he was right and somehow Meredith would get out of this mess before he had to stop breathing for her, but his air was running out more quickly than ever.

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Her mind made up, Meredith stood up and found her way to the interns' locker room. She didn't bother to change, not wanting to put back on that black dress, so she just grabbed her keys and exited the hospital. Going home wasn't an option, that would be the first place they would look for her once they realized she had left. Instead, she drove to the nearest library, parked her car, and grabbed some change from the ashtray to use for the printer inside.


End file.
